Day Five- Changes

Dear Someone,

I wake up everyday, scared of the changes that will make me look less like the woman I was yesterday and more like the one I will be tomorrow. I fear these changes, because I lose some of the qualities that I have come to accept about myself, and embrace others I never knew I wanted or needed. I fear that each day I change, I forget to learn something about the old me so I can help the future me. I fear that my blinded ambitions make me ignore the little things that make each day unique. I fear that my fear for the future overshadows my enjoyment in the present. Most of all, I fear that my search for something greater than me will make me lose sight of the things right in front of me.

I like to think I don't need anybody to lean on, that I can handle things on my own. But lately, I have come to accept the fact that I do need something or someone. I need the metaphorical rock to stand on, one that I know will catch me when I fall, one that will be my smile in the crowd and my joy through my pain. Believe it or not, I realize that I need God. It's that simple. You might choose to agree or disagree, I leave you to your conclusions.

But Food for Thought... When you are at that point in your life when nothing seems worth it, who do you lean on?

Signed

My Perfect Imperfection

Day Four: The Undecided

Dear Someone,

I find that, when you think things couldn't get more chaotic than they are, life tends to throw you another lemon. Senior year was supposed to be fun: hang with friends and reminisce on the past. There would be work, but it would have been fun doing it. Ironically, it's anything but... I'm tired, frustrated and I find myself being confused about everything. "Where do you see yourself in the next 5 years?" they ask.  My answer? "I don't know". Hell, I don't even know where I see myself in two months and that scares me. I have generic ideas about changing the world, being a better leader, but the real issue is I'm not sure how. I watch all these people who seemingly have their lives in order and I'm jealous: I too want to be sure of the path I'm taking, I want to know that the so & so industry is where I belong... However, the truth is I don't know and maybe that's not such a bad thing. I'll gladly bask in my uncertainty for as long as I can, because sometimes not knowing is the only way to go. So yea, for the first time in my life, I belong to the group of the undecided and I'm going to try to enjoy every minute of it.

So food for thought... what group do you belong to?

Signed

My Perfect Imperfection

Day Three: Meet Brown Eyes

Dear Someone,

So today I want to talk about Brown Eyes. No, I'm not talking about actual brown eyes, I'm talking about a person, someone who has, in recent times,become very close to me. He has a name but I like to call him Brown Eyes (funny I'm not even sure what the color of his eyes are). Brown Eyes and I became close under certain circumstances (he has a very untrue version of that story) but in the few months we have known each other, I'd say he's a pretty decent guy. 

      In a time where friendships are based on status, class, haves and have-nots,

      I find that there is one person who cares about who I am and not who I'm not,

      We have more arguments than normal people should,

      but he laughs it off because he says that's how we do,

      I'm glad I can call him a friend even when he's a ginormous geek,

      But I can't think of anyone else I'd rather have as my Mitch (male b**ch).

As you can see he makes me attempt poetry, I know I suck at it so say no more. He's geeky, sweet, annoying, irritates me half the time and I'm sure if he's reading this, he doing it while skyping with some chic cos in his mind he believes he's a ladies' man. So my Brown Eyes is not perfect, far from it but he makes me listen to new songs, read funny memes and generally see life from a different perspective and for that I am grateful.

So food for thought? Do you have your Brown eyes and if you do have you had your daily dose yet?

Signed 
My Perfect Imperfection

Day Two: Beyond the Stereotype

Dear Someone,

Today was... insightful! I find myself asking the question "who am I beyond my my stereotype?" I'm a woman so according to society, I am supposed to be emotional, sometimes irrational, dependent on the stronger sex and God forbid I want to be independent because that would mean I'm a feminist. I'm supposed to know how to cook, clean, take care of a home and typically be my significant other's silent cheerleader. I'm  Nigerian and again according to stereotypes, I am loud, deceitful and basically full of myself.  I'm African and so I'm underprivileged, under-educated and in need of superior guidance. 

After thinking about it and getting a bit ticked-off, I decided to do the only thing i could think of; introduce you to me; I am  a woman, I have my flaws but I am strong enough to embrace them, I make mistakes but I am smart enough to learn from them. Yes I am emotional but its because I believe there's nothing wrong with having a heart or being in touch with your feelings (it is a natural phenomenon, afterall). I get sad, upset and hurt like everyone else but I don't let that define who I am. I am Nigerian, a proud one at that :) I mean yea we do have a lot of issues with the corruption and the bombings but to list a few and honestly what country doesn't?  What makes me proud to be Nigerian you ask? It is being part of a community that is bounded by more than nationality, bounded by a sense of camaraderie... honestly how many people can say no matter where they go, and I mean anywhere, will still be able to feel at home as long as you find your "brothers and sisters" in that place? Can you say that? I can!  And last but not least, I am African. Part of a continent flowing with milk and honey, part of a revolution. We might not be there yet but I am part of that generation that will make a change.    

At the end of the day, I realize I am who I choose to be and I choose to be the future, to embrace my perfect imperfections, to become a force to reckon with; gender, nationality and race aside, I want to be part of a bigger purpose. I choose to simply be me.

So food for thought... Who are you beyond your stereotype?

Signed

My Perfect Imperfection

Day One: Dear Someone

Dear Someone,

I'm going through all the motions and emotions of growing up. I have finally gotten to that proverbial bridge we all say we'll cross and honestly I am terrified!!! In this 21st century where our generation shares almost everything online and ironically share nothing at the same time, I worry that at the end of the day we really only have ourselves (and God of course) to go through whatever phase we are going through. I don't know how this is going to turn out but I want to be able to tell somebody, anybody how I really feel. They say talking to a stranger is always easier, well if you're reading this, friend or foe, stranger or not, I hope you can understand where I'm coming from.
So this being my first post I have decided not to bombard you with too many words but food for thought? I decided to take my first step to stepping out of my comfort zone, what are you doing ?

Signed
My Perfect Imperfection